After the comedown of Brentford, here was the comeback. But not for Manchester United.
This was more West End than West London from United, at their riveting and raucous best until Diogo Dalot clumsily upended Noni Madueke in the 96th minute.
There had been 26 goals in the 80th minute and onwards in United’s 90-minute matches this season. Make that 28 now. The latest two both went to Chelsea and Cole Palmer.
Palmer was heckled with “City reject” by the United fans. If only the Wythenshawe-born boyhood Red had rejected City. It is unforgivable that United let him slip through the net. Palmer has joined the elite few who have scored a hat-trick against them.
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Also unforgivable is United’s knack for conceding late goals and conceding in quick succession. After a 99th-minute equaliser went past Andre Onana at Brentford, there were goals in the 110th and 111th.
Mauricio Pochettino and his staff charged onto the pitch. Erik ten Hag skulked down the tunnel without shaking hands. If there was any doubt, there can be no more. This United squad does not have the mentality to qualify for the Champions League.
Even in one of United’s finer performances of a chaotic campaign, this was ultimately evidence to file in the ‘Ten Hag out’ dossier. United sieved goals of a familiar variety and they were killed off at the death again. Antony appeared close to tears at the final shrill.
Magnificently backed by the deafening din from the away section of the Shed End, United performed at a level that suggested there was a “process” Ten Hag referred to during his pre-match press conference on Wednesday. But this was one of their most galling results.
United have a knack for 3-2 wins from 2-0 down and this seemed to be another. Elements of their performance were encouraging even when Chelsea were leading at 2-0 and they were not for nothing. United brimmed with silk and steel as they coped with more defensive casualties and introduced 19-year-old Willy Kambwala for a thorough examination.
Ten Hag has stretched it at times by lamenting United’s lucklessness and they were cut a thick slice by Moises Caicedo. Come added time, United were “Ole”ing. Palmer was reduced to hatchet man tactics on Dalot. Harry Maguire told Dalot to “stay down”. Instead, he brought Madueke down.
How the exhibition fare must have motivated Palmer. Even in a season laden with finales that defied belief, this was the most unbelievable involving United. Arsenal, Fulham and Chelsea have beaten them via stoppage-time goals.
It will be of little consolation to Ten Hag that United’s followers saw the best of them throughout the night. Casemiro held Ten Hag in a clinch after Alejandro Garnacho stopped short of crowd surfing in the away end. Maguire professionally eschewed the celebrations for a touchline conflab.
Garnacho urged the United supporters to extol Antony. This was the Brazilian’s best performance yet in a United shirt and his recall was instrumental. Little wonder he was crestfallen at the conclusion.
It is far too premature to herald this as a changing of the guard but Ten Hag must privately savour Antony’s impact in the absence of the dropped Marcus Rashford. Ten Hag claimed Rashford’s demotion was rotational but his name is bound to be among the substitutes against Liverpool again on Sunday.
For Knightsbridge resident and one-time Chelsea season-ticket holder Sir Jim Ratcliffe, this was as much of a home game as at Old Trafford. He was accompanied by Old Trafford task-forcer and Chelsea supporter Sebastian Coe, which would have made for lively conversation in the directors’ lounge.
Palmer, a left-footed right-sided forward on United’s doorstep, was gifted a second goal against them by the right winger United invested €100million in. This proved to be one of Antony’s finest nights in the red shirt and his gusto drew ripples of applause more than once from the away section. The exceptional Palmer had the last word.
Ten Hag moaned at Aaron Wan-Bissaka, back at right back, for losing an aerial duel with Mykhailo Mudryk and soon the problems were on the other side. Dalot beckoned Garnacho to track back and soon United were conceding from another pull-back. Conor Gallagher’s shot was another saveable conceded by Andre Onana.
The quiet Wan-Bissaka and Antony are an odd couple yet they have shown greater promise as a pairing than Portuguese speakers Dalot and Antony. The communication between the left-sided Latinos was awry for Conor Gallagher’s opening goal. United had three monitors installed in their dugout and the repeats would have made for uncomfortable viewing from every angle.
United coach Steve McClaren offered Wan-Bissaka some tidbits after Axel Disasi lost him for a corner. Wan-Bissaka was not entirely responsive and McClaren soon consulted one of the United analysts.
Disasi’s wayward header at 2-0 was pivotal. Caicedo unwittingly assisted Garnacho and soon United were as dominant as their ardent followers in the Shed End. Bruno Fernandes finished a brilliant team goal started by Onana and Chelsea’s 2-0 lead was extinguished within five minutes.
Wan-Bissaka and Antony’s unlikely alliance resumed and the latter, impressive in the reverse fixture in December, vindicated his recall despite naively conceding a penalty by fouling Marc Cucurella. The Brazilian salvaged a lost cause prior to Caicedo’s error and switched the play expertly for Dalot to assist Fernandes.
Pochettino, once destined to manage United, could not bear to watch when he realised the recipient of Caicedo’s pass did not wear blue. Ten Hag briefly looked condemned in the technical area and soon the unpopular Pochettino appeared strained. The two bickered over the referee’s refusal to book Maguire for an apparently deliberate foul.
United’s first-half momentum was almost halted at the death again by Gallagher, who struck the post at 2-2. Maguire implored the United bench to substitute the struggling Raphael Varane as Jonny Evans paced up and down the touchline. Evans’s arrival was delayed until the second half and Varane made way at the pause for the second match running, inviting more scrutiny on the United manager and medical staff. Evans was forced off after 20 minutes.
Rashford cut a disconsolate figure as United waited for their train at Stockport Station on Thursday morning. It was reminiscent of his detached body language at the same station five months earlier. He was not selected to start at Fulham, either, having purportedly failed a fitness test. Here, he was on the bench.
His demotion was compounded by Gary Neville “worrying” about Rashford on his podcast. That drew scorn from Rashford’s brother, Dwaine Maynard, via an Instagram Story post that reminded Neville of his exclusive with the United forward in the summer.
Ten Hag claimed Rashford was benched “for rotation to keep him and the team fresh through a busy period with another big game on Sunday”. Rashford played 15 minutes for England against Brazil, was unused against Belgium and substituted 80 minutes into United’s draw with Brentford.
Garnacho lined up for the 28th consecutive United game and scored twice in an otherwise predicted line-up. Ten Hag’s rationale did not wash. United are treading on eggshells with Rashford when Roy Keane had prescribed a “kick up the a–e”. Ten Hag offered him a pat on the back when he sent him on.
He gave Garnacho similar treatment after seemingly completing the comeback. Only there was a twist.